Vampires have been an unrelenting theme of film since the 20s, and it’s been getting worse every decade. With every generation, the vampires get less dangerous, more cuddly, and then more depressed, culminating in manic-depressive Romeos – you know who I mean – that mutilate the essence of the original monsters. A remake of the 70s’ soap, Tim Burton’s “Dark Shadows” starring Johnny Depp at least captures the turmoil.
Barnabas Collins (Depp), a powerful and wealthy nobleman, is living in the 18th century in present-day Maine and falls in love with the beautiful Josette. He’s cursed by a jealous witch (Eva Green) by turning into a Nosferatu-like vampire and imprisoned. 200 years later, his coffin is discovered and brought to his old house, where his descendants are now living in financial ruin. He escapes his coffin and he and the new matriarch decide that he should live with the family. He finds himself enamored with the Collins’ new governess, who reminds him of his previous love taken away from him by the witch Angelique. As with any fantastical screwball, it’s revealed that she is also still alive and young and running the rival company that’s bankrupting the Collins’. Determined to return the Collins name to its former fortune, Barnaby dedicates himself to reviving the family cannery business.
Johnny Depp (“Pirates”) and director Tim Burton have become nearly synonymous – they’re like the ultimate coworkers. Whether it’s “Edward Scissorhands,” “Corpse Bride,” “Alice in Wonderland,” or “Sleepy Hollow,” the two are rarely far apart. Both very talented in their own respects, their cinematic compatibility has been proven time and again, but I don’t think this was their best effort. I mean, Depp played his part perfectly (he kept the brooding to a reasonable minimum) and Burton organized everything down to the last detail, but there wasn’t much of a purpose here. Helena Bonham Carter, who played the Collins’ live-in shrink, is also not a stranger to a Burton-Depp relationship, but she seemed to be severely underused. Most of the cast was underused, actually; Michelle Pfeifer, a great famed actress, was nothing more than the secret-keeper. Chloe Moretz (Hugo) was actually pretty okay as the rebellious daughter, but it was mostly just her signature sarcasm.
The jokes were funny enough, but they only work when you’re in the right mood at the theater – these jokes wouldn’t have made anyone blink if watched at home. With the tagline, “Every family has its demons,” this was clearly intended to be a “my family is dysfunctional but it’s okay” kind of movie, and you can see the message, but it just doesn’t work well. Burton also added in cameos of members of the I Played a Vampire club, including Jonathan Frid (the original Barnabas) and Christopher Lee (the longest-running Dracula), which was a nice touch, but kind of obscure for those who aren’t too savvy in screen trivia, and therefore a bit pointless.
I don’t think this was as good a movie as “Sleepy Hollow” which had the perfect horror-comedy-mysticism mix, but it wasn’t too bad and it was fun to watch at the moment. Sometimes the jokes a removed vampire makes about the present day’s technology and pop culture can be overused. At least he didn’t sparkle.
Dark Shadows is rated PG-13 and runs for 113 minutes.
