Devil’s Don’t (Watch This Movie)

By Danny Thompson

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Let me start with the good. “Devil’s Due” had a cool concept for a horror film, and the actors themselves were fantastic. They seemed like real people. I liked the soundtrack too… and that’s where the good ends. There was no climax, no final battle of good versus evil, the plot was hollow, and the movie felt more like a romantic comedy than a horror film.

The plot centers around a couple of newlyweds, Zach and Samantha McCall (Zach Gilford and Allison Miller), who are on their honeymoon in the Dominican Republic when they are kidnapped and submitted to a satanic ritual. Sam soon discovers she is pregnant (even though she has been on the pill) and prepares to have a baby. Unfortunately for her the baby is the antichrist. Sam begins to act strangely, speaking in tongues and carving symbols all over the house, and Zach notices that they are being spied on by a satanic cult. Sam becomes more and more unpredictable and violent until she cuts open her belly and delivers the baby as members of the cult show up to retrieve it. Sam dies, Zach is suspected of murder, and the movie ends with a couple in Paris being picked up by the same suspicious cabbie who kidnapped Zach and Sam. As the credits roll, upbeat and happy music plays, betraying the fact that the producers themselves must have recognized this movie as a total joke.

That’s what it feels like when it’s finished. It’s like the movie goes “Yup, we got you! The only scary thing was how empty this movie was.” By empty I mean that this thing felt like a really long trailer or a storyboard for a good movie. There was little to no developement for the characters other than that two of them end up dead. It was kind of like a bunch of scenes put together rather than a seamless movie. The good guys were never given a chance to rid themselves of evil, and the events barely built to a climax. The plot felt very linear and stationary. To put it a different way, it was like watching someone’s home movies, but I guess that’s how it was supposed to feel.

It’s shot similar to “Paranormal Activity”, all stationary video cameras set up by satan worshipers and handheld camcorders that Zach is using to document the family’s early life together. Together it just makes for a disjointed story. The worst part about it was, that aside from not being very good, it wasn’t scary. At all. Your little cousin would’ve enjoyed it. I remember my friends and I laughing out loud at points that were supposed to make us scream. All in all it was like watching a movie about a pregnant lady who acted incredibly strange and irrational… So it was like watching a movie about a pregnant lady.

If my friend didn’t work at the movies and couldn’t have gotten me in for free, I’d have been asking for my money back. I spoiled the ending for you so “Devil’s Due” won’t spoil your weekend.

1/5 Stars